Diary of a Year 9 High School Teacher

Our guest author for our ‘diary of a teacher’ blog series is Jane Corcoran.

Jane is an Australian high school teacher, writer and mother. She is passionate about compassion and curious about culture.

Jane says she has ‘no bloody idea’ how to confidently teach her own children (let alone other people’s) about the complicated and nuanced territory that is sex and sexuality - but she’s showing up to find out. And thinks you need to as well.

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 ‘Maaaate. You’re such a p#$sy’ hollers one 14- year-old boy to another, who (I know, this is rather ironic) – just refused to read in front of the class.  

A cacophony of chair sinking groans and knowing ‘oooooos, you’ve done it now’ reverberate throughout the classroom. 

Why? Because they all know that for the next 10 minutes, me (their Grade 9 English teacher) – is going to rant (their word, not mine. I’m assuming ‘rant’ these days means ‘educate’ or ‘enlighten’ – funny how language evolves). 

She’s going to rant about the absurdity of the slang term ‘pussy’ connoting weakness. The ridiculousness of pressuring each other to perform in alignment with a ‘gender role’.  

How can we expect young men to respect women when the words we use to communicate and connect demean women? How can we expect women to respect themselves and own what they desire and deserve if they’re constantly getting messages of ‘I am less than’?

Language evolves right alongside humans. What is in our hearts and minds flows through our mouths and creates ways of being in the world. And these ways of being look like gender inequality. The first step towards preventing gendered violence is to achieve gender equality:“Achieving gender equality is key to preventing violence” [Delegate Statement, 2021 National Summit on Women’s Safety]. 

Dr Bianca Fileborn is a senior lecturer in Social and Political Science at the University of Melbourne. Her current work focuses on sexual violence and harassment.

Dr Fileborn says “the fact is, these behaviours are learnt. Which means they can be unlearnt.” 

So, back to grade 9 English… 

 They think I don’t know but they have a game where they count every time I say the words ‘toxic masculinity’, ‘violence against women’, ‘language matters’ and ‘you’re better than that’. Actually, it’s quite cute how they team up when they run out of fingers to keep track. I like to think I’m explicitly teaching team work and numeracy skills as well. What an ‘educational triple threat’ I am. 

In these moments I try to facilitate open and honest communication. I ask them to tell me about their thoughts and their experiences.  

Behold, the following interaction between me and, let’s call him John:  

Me:      What does ‘pussy’ represent? 

John:   Oh miss. Can we not?

Me:      No, John. We must. What did you mean when you called him pussy?

John:   He’s a pussy. 

Me:      Which means?

John:   He’s weak. 

ME:     Because pussy represents…

John:   … a pussy….

Me:      Which is….

John:   Don’t make me say it Missz.

Me:      … a pussy represents…

John:   a chick’s bits. 

Me:      A vulva (pretty sure vulva is 10 points by the way)

John:   Yeah that. 

Me:      Babies come out of ‘chick’s bits’ John.  A vagina in particular. Ever watched a woman give birth John?

John:   Please don’t make me watch that Miss. 

Me:      I’m not going to make you watch it. All I’m going to say is that vaginas are bloody strong John. Incredibly strong. Balls on the other hand… 

So, yeah… I’m that teacher. I’m that teacher because I am fuelled with a drive to change this endemic of violence against women one miniscule micro moment at a time for that is all I can do. I don’t have the power to change laws or give funding or save lives. But I can “rant” in the hope that even the tiniest seed of change will be planted. And I think that is something that we can all do. Culture change is a process and we all have a role to play. We can all change the language we’ll accept in the scripts of our everyday. 

This form of communication between peers may seem innocuous. I can understand why people believe it’s just ‘a bit of banter between boys.’ Yes, to some degree it is – but banter and language are saturated with meaning. This meaning has served to create gender roles and as a result, gender inequality. 

Of course, there are many threads to the complicated tapestry that is gender inequality and sexual violence, but we hold a piece of the puzzle in the behaviour we accept from young men and women. 

Our words are too precious to be flippant with.